We want to look GOOD! Our patients say they want to look attractive. And it is true. Deeper down, though, they often admit, "When I look in the mirror, I just don't look right. I want to look more like me."

Of course some patients also want to look younger and our first five columns were about youthening. Now, we'll speak about beauty and how we look to each other… and ourselves… in the face. (In future columns, we'll speak about the rest of the body.)

Beauty matters in our culture. Lookism is rampant. We rate each others' looks, often without noticing we do it. On a scale of facial attractiveness, five being average and ten gorgeous, studies show that the goodies in life — money, power and satisfaction — tend to go to the six to ten's.

Often we hear a more personal message. Even when people do look okay to others, they don't look good to themselves.

"I just don't look right."

We suffer when our face, or some feature of it, doesn't fit who we are. As near as we can tell, everyone, even those of us with reasonable self-esteem, would change some part of our face if we could. It might be anything — a large nose, protruding ears, acne scarring, a weak chin, a fat neck, chubby cheeks, a down-turned mouth, low eyebrows. Our focus on this disliked, even hated, feature, can be intense.

Some have an inner conversation about their focus. One young woman told us it went like this for her "… my nose is too big - they're looking at my nose - maybe if I turn like this - oh, what's wrong with me, I can't stop thinking about my nose - my nose is too big". It's like a crazy tape loop that runs over and over. For others, the focus is vague. "I just don't look right" or "There's just something about my face…" And their voice trails off, resigned.

"I want to feel better about myself."

Our patients want to look better to themselves. They say things like, "I just want to look normal." Or, "I just want to look like I should."

Most, suffering or not, simply want to improve their appearance. "I do my hair, wear nice clothes, exercise. Why should I ignore my face? It's my most precious possession."

How cosmetic surgery can help

 Cosmetic surgery helps people look more like themselves. As one of our patients told us, laughing, "I look more like me now than I ever did."

We can reduce the large nose, bring the receding chin out to the balance point to get a better profile, push ears back, correct an angry look. And much more. We can usually raise a person's looks two points on a scale of ten, say from a four to a six (from below average to above average) or from a six to a very attractive eight.

Is it worth having cosmetic surgery to look better? Whether your answer is "yes" or you are undecided, a cosmetic surgery consultation will help you get clear what improvement we can reasonably expect. Also you can become more certain what the cost is — in terms of time, money, recovery, possible complications, and what friends and relatives might say.

Cosmetic surgery is an effective and powerful tool for personal change. Our view has come to be that cosmetic surgery supports people to have their face and/or body come into harmony with their true inner being — their youth and beauty.

"Now I look more like me."

They look better. They feel better about themselves. And the crazy-loop conversation stops. We have seen personalities shift completely after the focus of their preoccupation is corrected. Their "mask of ugliness" (as one patient phrased it) is removed and life begins from a whole new place.

Sometimes people don't know they were suffering until after cosmetic surgery has corrected the focus area. Now they understand why they had done nothing for so long — they were resigned that nothing could be done about it.

Looking back, "Sure, I was suffering, but I didn't know it. I thought suffering was normal. I am so proud I had the courage to have cosmetic surgery."

Harvey W. Austin, MD
Box 1470
Berlin MD 21811
email: h.austin@mchsi.com